For many couples, the interaction goes awry when one partner becomes angry at having to ask for attention or care. But the majority of them, if they can build a life and settle, will be fine. They just need to be given a chance. The next week, though, he starts to get uncomfortable. Instead of discussing their concerns and needs, they lash out.
They have to be perfect victims. Also, a secure attachment helps partners as individuals, too. Thank you for bringing families together not tearing them apart. Kyriakides, who works at the centre for Refugee Studies at York University, has been examining refugee relationships in two other studies in the Canadian context over the past year and a half. In other words, she responds compassionately and appreciates that he can articulate his needs and emotions. According to Blum, both partners in a secure relationship are able to tune into, identify and accept their own emotions and needs. Thank you for considering our differences a reason for strength not weakness. She blogs regularly about body and self-image issues on her own blog, Weightless , and about creativity on her second blog Make a Mess. In response, the wife may apologize and thank her husband for being honest. Trust is another part of a secure relationship. Just as they had a life prior to refuge, they want a life after refuge. Follow her on Twitter: So what does a securely attached couple look like? She also might suggest they hire a babysitter and enjoy a night out. Gratitude is immensely personal. The International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy website lists several noted research publications. They have to be passive. Again, take the above example. On a side note, many people, especially men, feel ashamed about feeling lonely or needing their partner. Canadian academics studying aspects of their lives here say refugees are seen through the lens of two narratives: But the majority of them, if they can build a life and settle, will be fine. For many couples, the interaction goes awry when one partner becomes angry at having to ask for attention or care. Sue Johnson and Les Greenberg, emotionally focused therapy or EFT draws on attachment theory, which asserts that humans are hardwired for strong emotional bonds with others. But being attached to your partner is actually a good thing. The husband knows that when he talks to his wife about his feelings, she will care and listen to his needs and feelings. Mustafa Alio is a former refugee to Canada who co-founded Refugee Career JumpStart Project, an organization that helps refugees find career-enhancing jobs.
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